Just recently we had a gathering where the presence of God was uniquely . . . well . . . present.  I have given up trying to explain the actual experience.  You know He is there when He is there.  And while He promises that He is there whenever His people gather, there are times . . . moments even . . . when His presence is more consciously realized by those that are there.  It is supernatural.  A miracle.  It changes things in the gathering and in the hearts of those who are there.

I have personally experienced this in a variety of settings, particularly during times of worship, both in the presence of others who follow Jesus, and in my own personal time of worship.  I'm not sure that you would agree or whether you may totally understand what I'm saying with this, but when a particularly anointed song or moment breaks forth it moves me to the point of the inner man nearly trembling . . . and then tears often follow which seemingly flow all on their own.  This experience so parallels my experience with the manifestation of the Holy Spirit's gifts and also in moments of healing grief or a moment of healing breakthrough.  It rises from a hidden spiritual well within.  It cannot be generated . . . only embraced.  

These moments can be resisted and suppressed.  I have done it, and have seen others do it, for a variety of reasons . . . but often due to a fear of embarrassment in the presence of others and an unyielded spirit of control.  I have come to learn over the years that is partially what grieving the Holy Spirit is all about.  However, if we simply allow the anointing of the Holy Spirit free access and flow in those moments we will indeed encounter the presence of God . . . the fuller weight and freedom of the Trinity . . . 3-in-1.

What do I mean by this?  

In these moments the Love of the Father, Abba, soaks our being.  Body, soul, spirit, mind, emotions and purpose are flooded by His love.  There is a saturation of our essence and in those moments we know that we are loved, accepted, forgiven and cared for . . . regardless of our failures, trails and struggles.

The Living Word . . . Yeshua/Jesus . . . floods our deepest self and the Truth penetrates crack and crevice, broken and walled-off places in our heart and mind.  It is in these moments of penetrating Truth that we know, beyond all lie and circumstance, that we have a hope and a future.  'It is Well With My Soul' becomes the most foundational reality.  The presence of the Living God has come upon us, filled us, surrounded us and establishes that 'nothing can separate us from the love of God."  Not even our own errant thinking, ways or choices.  In these moments the fulfillment of Jesus' words become a fulfilled promise in our experience . . . not just our theology.

"If anyone thirsts, let him come to Me and drink.  He who believes in Me, as the Scripture has said, out of his heart (belly) will flow rivers of living water."

John explains that, " . . . He spoke concerning the Spirit, whom those believing in Him would receive . . ."  There is no better way to describe the moment of filling when the Holy Spirit moves upon our heart and innermost being.  The word translated 'river' here means as much a 'torrent and flood', as any classic image of a river.  Figuratively, it means the 'greatest abundance'.  The word translated 'heart' isn't the standard word for heart as we would normally see translated, and the use of 'heart' actually somewhat obscures the fuller understanding.  This word literally means 'the entire cavity of the whole belly'.  In my experiences with the LORD this describes that fresh and needed move of the Holy Spirit . . . a flooding, penetrating presence within the innermost places of my being.  This move can become a torrent as we surrender to His presence and allow Him to fully wash over us, cleansing the inside of the cup and running out and beyond us.

Have you had one of these moments?  Have you felt the rising of grief, or tears, or that you are going to lose control in these moments?  I lament with you, that so often our classical Christian services do not leave room for the Holy Spirit's greater move.  If and when the moment of surrender, release and filling come, the schedule of our meetings suppress and grieve the Holy Spirit, as we move onto the next next thing in our 'order of service' . . . announcements, service needs or sometimes it's just the next bullet point in the sermon.  I speak as a pastor who has done just this thing and later wept that I made the service more important than His ministry.

I exhort pastors and ministers.  Please be willing to lay aside your outline and the Order of Service when you know, deep in your heart, that the Holy Spirit is moving on the sheep He has entrusted to your care.  Encourage them to let go, to cry, grieve and let go of control.  I believe there is a need for great lamenting in the Body of Christ, before joy and empowerment will ever come.

As pastors we say we want empowered, serving followers of Christ, yet we orchestrate hindrances within the gatherings of our ministry to them.  How odd.  Of what are we afraid?  

Dear pastor, are you afraid of letting go of your own control?  Maybe you first need to have your own healing encounter with your Father.  Maybe you need to personally experience His grace . . . His loving and accepting presence in the broken places of your own life.  We as ministers cannot provide for others what we have not experienced ourselves.  Let us not be the blind leading the blind into the ditch.

Dear sheep of His pasture . . . I encourage you to embrace the Father's move upon your being.  Cry, weep, grieve, receive His ministry to you.  Release and receive.  Don't hold it back.  Don't swallow back the move of God, suppress it and grieve the LORD.  The widows of these miracles only come as we yield to them and allow Him to have His way within us.  The more we yield, the more often these moments begin to come.  Allow the tide to be turned in your life by the life-giving move of His presence.

That word translated 'heart' or 'belly' that I mentioned a few paragraphs above has even deeper meaning.  It means also 'to be given up to the pleasures of the palate, to gluttony'.  It reminds me of the Scripture . . .

"You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore."

There are several worship songs that we sing which reference the fact that the more we 'eat and drink' of the LORD, the more we hunger and thirst for Him.  If there is a place for gluttony . . . this is the meal  for which we were designed to feast . . . the presence of the LORD.

The 'heart' in this passage can also refers to the womb . . . the place where the fetus is conceived and nourished until birth.  While theologically we understand that there is a single-point of salvation and re-birth of our spiritual essence, sanctification (as it unfolds in our daily life) is like a death and re-birth everyday.  We die to self, our hardness, our untouchability, our self-protection, and our learned independence from God . . . and we become alive to His ways, truth, and life.  To encounter the filling presence of God is to experience a miracle of change within us.  It has the power to birth the change and transformation for which we cry out.  

"Change me, Father!
I am imprisoned to my self.
To the lies of the Enemy.
To ways of this world.
Perform a miracle in me.
I cannot find a way to change myself.  
You must do this in me!
I give my life to You!"

Worship places us in the 'opportunity for a miracle'.  Anointed worship music can facilitate this encounter.  We should avail ourselves to it.  Whether in gathering together, or in the solitude of our personal worship of the Father, encountering the presence of God regularly is vital in our walk with Him . . . and for the healing, strengthening and sustaining of our being.

If there is one nugget of advice I can give as a counselor for the broken and those in need of healing it is this . . . 

Come Into His Presence And Truly Worship Him.
Don't Hold Back With God.
Seek Him with all your heart, soul, mind and strength.
Then yield to Him, as the flooding of His presence rises within.

You will find your healing, true self and purpose with Him in that place.